Today, I woke up and discovered that, to my dismay, I still wasn’t rich. I then checked my Instagram and saw that my follow count was going down faster than a hooker on a promise. Disheartened at my ever-straining activities proving fruitless, I then looked at my emails and noticed it was full of crap from people doing better than I was and that the best thing I had to look forward to today was taking a walk in the daylight hours. Even that was tarnished by hayfever, though. Life loves throwing its curveballs. And so, by the end of the day, hilariously, I seemed to have gotten nowhere further than if I’d just stood still.
Typical – I spend every day racking my brains on how to masterclass my way to a better life, only to find that, no matter which way I face it, I get it completely f***ing wrong.
So I come home, snivelling and tired, and I stare at the frowning girl reflecting back at me in the mirror.
Bless her, she looks so terribly sad. Her shoulders slump from carrying the weight of the world on them, and I can hear the words she keeps on repeating over and over to herself.
“You suck at this. You suck at life. It doesn’t matter what you were born to do – destiny has other plans for people like you. You’re not one of the lucky ones.”
Poor thing. She just doesn’t see it.
Societal expectations and constructs can sometimes make us feel like losers. Every day we’re surrounded by people who seem to make it look so easy. They go on a talent show and are a household name overnight. They walk through a street in London and become the next Top Model. They post something online and it goes viral. And even if we feel empowered or inspired by their roaring success, those of us who yearn for our talents to be recognised and make a difference to others can’t help but wonder why we’re still not there yet. What is it, exactly, that we’re doing wrong?
Simple answer? I haven’t a clue.
In all honesty, the only thing we can do is take a leaf out of the book from those who have shown success and stop poking holes in ourselves for not being where they are. It’s hard, I know. Take it from the woman who scolds herself one minute and then reminds herself to chin up the next, but a person who is continuously learning and trying to improve their lives is not a loser! Sure, we may not be earning megabucks and living in a mansion with a jumbo jet and personal Jeeves on call, but is that really what makes someone a “winner?”
In my eyes, numbers don’t really mean that much. Despite how it may seem, most decent talent usually gets left underground because it’s money that really talks. Money is the answer to most successful marketing. Therefore, people, businesses or artists etc., who have more wonga behind them are undoubtedly going to reach “The Top” that bit faster. More exposure ultimately means more traffic. Which is why we sometimes get confused when we hear about someone or something becoming “successful” for trivial reasons. We cock our heads, stare at what’s in front of us and think, “What a load of old shite! I could’ve done a better job with my eyes closed and hands tied behind my back!”
The truth is though, the difference between talent and money can often get lost in translation. Just because someone is well-known doesn’t mean that they’re successful. Seeing that they have a million followers doesn’t mean that they have it all. In actual fact, they might be just as miffed as you are with their lives, but they just don’t say it. However, for those who do seem to have climbed to the top via chairlift, don’t bother comparing with them. They’re the “lucky” few. Emotional swamping won’t help your cause, and if your goal is to reach the top with your integrity still intact then know it’ll take some guts. Be prepared for the times you’ll fall down because it will happen. Life is never without its hurdles. Inevitably though, they’re what makes us stronger. But you have to be clever, you have to be determined, but most of all, you have to be patient.
Most of us aren’t fortunate enough to have had the privilege of being born with a silver spoon wedged in our mouths. Most of us have to work jobs we hate, sacrifice free time in place of our projects and then bear the nausea of chasing our own tails. Welcome, my friends, to the rollercoaster we call, “Life!” But that’s just it. Successful journeys aren’t a direct route – they’re packed with ups and downs, turbulent weather and an unknown timescale. They have to be fought for. And if you want something badly enough, nothing will get in your way.
Remember, a winner is just a loser who tried one more time. And as much as numbers may seem important, you’ve also got to keep in mind that it’s about quality, not quantity.
So remain consistent, hold your head up and stop yelling at the face in the mirror. Keep going and keep growing, and one day, you’ll realise it was a winner staring back all along.