Dear, Little Me…

This time last year you asked a question of patience. You said that good things may come to those who wait, but in order for change you must be responsible for its beginning – How? How do you know if the decision you make will be the right one? Or in fact, if it’s of any meaning at all? If I’ve learned anything over the course of 2017, it’s that sometimes the pocket-sized choices we make are the ones that fashion the most unexpected and remarkable creations.

It was on NYE 2016 that you finally came up with an answer to your dilemma:

  • If I don’t do it: Nothing changes. No risk, no danger. But I feel no sense of relief and everything that happens around me is a result of me being stationary, physically and emotionally.
  • If I do it: The whole dynamic changes. You start over with a fresh outlook and can move forward. It could lead to something great. Or, what you already have, could be well and truly ballsed up. You can’t take back what you’ve done and the change is irreversible.

And you took the plunge.

It didn’t go according to the hopeful plans. In fact, the things you expected to happen, didn’t, and the things you never expected, did. Both completely the undesired way around.

However, the domino-fall of calamity that followed was more precedent than you knew. Through all the tears you shed, the dreams that shattered into pieces and the hopes that were dashed, you made a decision: “Whatever life throws at me, I’m arming myself with a bat, and I’m going to home-run with every swing.”

With time of the essence, you said yes to everything that followed. You stopped worrying about the trivial (that you’re not pretty enough, or that you’ve been unfriended again) and you remembered a time before all of that mattered. You regressed and brought it to your world today. Like a child, you had no fear. Because when you’re at the bottom, what have you got to lose? So for every crap day, every crappy person and every crappier situation, you went with it, not against it. Because shit happens. Life is shit sometimes. But it’s also beautiful, and you found that in one little decision – to remember who you are.

“Have confidence in who you are and what you want. It’s achievable, as long as you believe you can do it. If it doesn’t work out, then you tried. Some things aren’t meant to be. But, then at least you can move forward, whatever the outcome.”

If you can dream it, you can do it. Will it be a flawless journey? No. Will it take long? Yes. Will I know if it’s working? No. Is it worth it? Every second.

Everything you are today amounts to every decision you made in your yesterdays. So do it. If you crash and burn don’t give up, just change direction. If opportunity knocks, answer. If you hear no knock, then build a door.

We can’t control our lives, but we can certainly find ways to invite our wishes inside it.

So to Little Me, when you read this again on December 17th 2018, tell me, was it worth the risk? Was it worth the tiny investments? Have they worked out for you? Have those you loved been and gone? Are they still there? Or have they been replaced once more? I’d love to know.

As for now, with 2017 reaching its imminent conclusion, it’s time to wrap up the year with some of the greatest memories. Out of the 365 days you’ve survived, I present to you the best of times, the best of people, the experiences shared with them, through them and because of them.

Of course, there are many special faces that have provided some fantastic times that haven’t been caught on camera, so to all of you I say, “Thank you. You are awesome. But next year, let’s get a selfie, okay?”

Adios, 2017. Thanks for the memories.

 

 

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s